My position on all things religious, political, and "controversial" is this: If it doesn't affect me, I just plain don't give a shit. I don't waste time caring about what other people say and do. I don't campaign for people to change their minds about anything whether it be circumcision, church, or abortion. Your opinions are your own, and I assume you have your reasons for them. Because this has been my stance for so long, nothing bothers me more than people who try and force their opinions and their beliefs on me because they differ from theirs. It's one thing to simply share your opinion, because you are always entitled to do so, it is quite another to tell me I am doing something wrong just because it differs from the way you chose to do things.
Since I am pregnant, the main thing irking me these days is the c-section debate. Here's the thing, you have your own uterus, so how 'bout you just worry about that one and ignore mine altogether. I am sick of woman (thankfully, I have yet to run into a man who has brought up his opinion on c-sections; those men should be equally as thankful that they have yet to meet me as well -- no uterus, no opinion.) I am sick of women who spend so much time "educating" all us stupid moms on the "risks" of c-sections. Don't you have a newborn? Shouldn't you be paying attention to all the children you bore naturally in a bathtub with Enya playing in the background? I'm glad that worked for you, I however, have zero interest in a) not having immediate access to medical attention b) no drugs (don't even get me started on that argument!) and c) cleaning up that mess afterward. For me, childbirth is not one tiny bit about me or my experience. I have never wasted a moment of my life planning what the perfect experience would be. Each time I have had but 1 concern: get my baby here, and get him here safely. If that means that he needs to get out of his comfy womb as quickly as possible, and that means via c-section, so be it. A living, breathing baby is infinitely more important than having the "perfect" childbirth experience. No one will ever convince me otherwise. No amount of facts and statistics and made-up data will ever change my mind on that. I understand that some women are coerced into c-sections by the doctors
for varying reasons that may or may be legitimate, but that isn't the
only reason women have c-sections. I shouldn't be
berated for my choice just because some women can't stand up for
themselves. I have had 1 child each way and the experience was no less euphoric with one or the other. My 1st caused a lot of damage being born vaginally and quite frankly I never want to have to endure that pain again. My 2nd couldn't handle mild contractions and stopped breathing; my only thought was to get him out and put him in my arms, and my doctor did that quickly with a c-section. Seeing her lift my boy over the sheet brought a relief I was so afraid I wouldn't get. He was alive and well, and breathing beautifully. All 10 lbs 3 oz of him. If his brother did so much damage at a pound smaller, I doubt this one would have been any easier.
What all of this boils down to is that all women are different. Some women labor for 2 hours and suddenly give birth with absolutely no problems. Others labor for 36 hours just to wind up with an emergency c-section because they simply do not have the energy to go on. Many of us fall somewhere in between. If you want to deliver your baby in the comfort of your own home I think you should do that, and you should have the right to do that. But why do you care if I choose not to? Why must you continue to push the no-cesarean way down my throat? Yes, I know what a VBAC is, yes my doctor has offered, no I'm not dumb enough to go for it. Speaking from experience, I prefer the c-section. Don't tell me what is best for me, my body, and my baby. For the love of God, do NOT preach to me about how mother's intuition will guide me through a naturally delivery. My mother's intuition is the very reason my son was born alive. I knew he couldn't handle a vaginal delivery so I didn't waste time trying for it just so I could get what I wanted. It is really nobody's damn business why I chose to have a c-section last time or why I am choosing to have one again this time. I have defended my side here, but I shouldn't have to. If I say that's what I chose, that's that. Let it go. Go home and call all your little "all-natural" friends and talk about what a horrible person and mother I am. That's fine. But you sure as shit better not tell me I made the wrong decision, unless you want to be publicly humiliated. I have never given a single thought to your uterus and what you choose to do with it, so I am only asking that you show me the same respect and keep your nose out of mine.