Kid: Is this what you are looking for?
Me: No, that's pita bread.
Kid: hmmm, is this it?
Me: nope. That's still pita bread.
Kid asks deli folk if they know. All 4 people behind the counter stare at me like I have 2 heads.
Deli 1: is it that stuff on that shelf there?
Me: no. That's pita bread. I'm looking for tortillas. They come stacked in a bag?
Deli 2: oh yeah, you mean like for dip? Did you check the chip aisle?
Me: [Face. Palm.] No, not like tortilla chips, just plain tortillas.
Deli 1: Hey Rhonda! (ok, so I don't know if her name was Rhonda or not, but if it wasn't it shoulda been) Do you know if we carry tortillas?
Rhonda walks up: hmmm, no, I don't think we do. Wait, is it that stuff on the shelf behind you?
Me: yeah no, that's still pita bread. I'm looking for soft tortillas. Like what you would make a burrito out of.
Rhonda: oh! We have burritos in the frozen food section!
Me: not what I'm looking for
Deli 2: did you try the international foods aisle?
Me: the who what?
Deli lady 3 who has kept her mouth shut thus far: I think I know what you're looking for (praise the lord!). I'll show you.
Rhonda: If they're not there show her where those burritos are
This lady showed me to the correct aisle (incidentally, tortillas are in fact on the "international food aisle") and I got what I needed, but not before The little guy lost his shoe a threw a tantrum when Bug tried to help him get it back on and BDT screamed bloody murder while I chased after the deli lady( who didn't even slow down) and my tortillas.
There is a very good reason why I don't do the grocery shipping. I'm also not really in the mood for tacos anymore.