Holy Crap! I Have A 4 Year Old!

How in the hell did that happen? Time really does fly when you're having fun! I am really having a hard time wrapping my head around the fact that my little Bug is turning 4 today. 4 year olds are big kids, they go to preschool, they have friends of their own, they get embarrassed when their mom gives them a kiss goodbye. I am not ready for those things! I wish now that I had some home videos of Bug when he was a baby but we don't own a video camera so....that's that. I so desperately want to go back, just for a day, and cherish those 1st few months with him. Even though we have a baby now too, I know that Bug was so different and I just want to remember what it felt like to hold my own baby, for the very first time, to have my child's hand wrap around my finger, for the very first time, and to be called mama, for the very first time.

Don't get me wrong, I love watching him grow up too! Babies don't say hilarious things. They don't have little attitudes, they don't know how to push your buttons, and they make embarrassing displays at Target, and even though those things seem awful when they are happening, they are all a part of what that little person will become. I really enjoy the person that my oldest child has become and I love being able to have real conversations with him and read big kid books with him. But it doesn't stop here. He is just going to get bigger every year! One day all of the hilarious and adorable things he says will be replaced by f-bombs and teenage lingo that I won't understand and eye rolls. And I will wish that I could go back to today, the day he turned 4. So I guess I will just have to cherish his 4th year now so that I don't miss it later.

Next year he will be 5, and 5 year olds are kindergarten. And mothers of 5 year olds in kindergarten are old! young and sprite, right? Oh crap.

I love you Bug! Backtalk, boogers, temper tantrums, and all!