It's Parenting, Not Politics

When I found out I was pregnant with my 1st child, I immediately started thinking about parenting. What kind of parent did I want to be? What kind of parent did I not want to be? Would I let my children watch TV? Would I feed them mac n' cheese from a box? Would I immunize? Would I breastfeed? When I started considering all of my options, I considered what I thought was best for me, my husband, and our child. I wanted to breastfeed as long as I could, however long that may be. I was fairly certain I would opt out of a few immunizations based on a family history of severe allergic reactions, mostly my brother's extreme, non-verbal autism (I'm not getting into THAT discussion, not right now anyway). I didn't want my kids to watch a ton of TV but some would be OK, and that's because I don't watch a ton of TV. I'd probably make mac n' cheese. from a box. a lot. because it's damn good. I thought about the best parent I could be. Do you want to know what I never once considered? What kind of parenting would be the most controversial? What can I do that is going to make all the other mom's at the park whisper behind my back? What are the parenting hot topics that I can argue about with every parent I meet? No, I pretty much just want to be the kind of parent whose kids grow up to be healthy, upstanding citizens. I want them to be smart, funny, loving, but most importantly good-looking successful wealthy, um, good people. I don't want all gender neutral toys, all of my children will be born in a hospital with the aid of either drugs or doctor wielding a scalpel, I'm not wasting money on all organic food, I'm definitely not making my own baby food or using cloth diapers, and I'm sure as fuck not breastfeeding my kid until he can walk up to me and tell me to give him my boob. I chose not to do these things because I just don't believe in the benefits; these parenting styles just don't fit with my life. I didn't, however, decide to go in this direction because I wanted to be controversial. I'm not preaching to every mother to be that she shouldn't immunize, or that she needs to breastfeed for exactly one year; no more, no less. Those are decisions that every mother to be needs to make for herself. Ok, I guess she can discuss it with her husband too.

That all being said, I don't give a shit if you want to do any or all of those things. 1st of all, I believe every parent has the right to raise their children based on their own values and way of life (assuming it isn't harmful). I also have the right to choose my friends, so if I am uncomfortable around a mom because she is breastfeeding her 6 year-old, I have the choice to not hang out with them anymore. I absolutely cannot stand being around parents who insist on pushing their parenting philosophy down my throat. We are all just trying to do a good job. We need to support eachother, not berate eachother for insignificant differences in parenting style. A very dear friend of mine breastfed her daughter for 8 months, but it was far from easy. She nursed, then pumped, then bottle fed, then pumped again. 4,5,6 times a day. That kind of schedule is mentally and physically exhausting, but she endured for 8 whole months. When she finally made the decision to stop, she felt guilty. Why should she feel guilty? Why can't other mom's just applaud her for all of her hard work? She should be proud of herself. I'm proud of her. I can't understand why anyone would care how long she nursed for. And guess what? Her daughter is perfectly healthy so all the haters can shove it.

My point, if I haven't made it painfully clear yet, is that contreversal parenting topics are just parenting topics. People with a thirst for drama and a need for attention create the controversy. I don't like those people, and I don't have the time or patience for them. I'm not reading their blogs, I'm not humoring them. I'm ignoring them in hopes that they will get the point that I don't need them to preach to me.

Reason # 49,675 That I Hate the PTC

If there is one activist group I hate more than PETA it's The Parent's Television Council (the PTC). Ok, I still probably hate PETA more but the PTC is a close 2nd. Anyway, they are once again all up in arms about a stupid TV show. The show is modeled after the blog/book "Shit My Dad Says" which by the way I follow and it is HI-larious. The title of the show is "*$^% My Dad Says" or something like that, and naturally the PTC is raising a stink because they have nothing better to do, like raise their children for instance. They would rather fight TV stations and argue over an insignificant word that their children might hear on TV than actually, you know, PARENT their children and just not allow them to watch that station. Here is the entire article. There is really nothing new or interesting from the PTC, they are just as buttoned up and annoying as always. 1st of all, the network isn't even using the word "shit" they are using symbols. 2nd of all, the word is "SHIT". It has absolutely no meaning other than shit. There is no reason to get offended. 3rd of all, shit is an awesome word. I use it daily. My children will probably use it daily at some point in their life as well and that is fine by me. It is just a word. And even if the network had wanted to use the word "fuck" in the title, I don't give a shit! (See what I did there? I used shit in a sentence because it's awesome). They are just words, and if they offend you than you need to learn to not take offense to things that are not being used directly at you.

If I want to watch TV shows with sex and violence and profanity, then back the hell off me. If I don't want my kids to see that stuff then I will do whatever it takes so that they don't see it. Most good shows come on after bedtime anyway, it isn't like they are trying to air this show Saturday morning between Mickey Mouse Clubhouse and Phineas and Ferb. It is a prime-time show, meaning it will be aired at night. If it happens to be on during your kids awake hours, turn off the goddamn TV! The world does not revolve around YOUR kids. We need to quit making it easier for lousy parents to continue to ignore their children. Other people are adults who might not have kids and the deserve to see entertaining television that contains adult content. I don't really mind my kids seeing certain adult shows. Yes, Bug has picked up on things he shouldn't have, because we might have let him watch the Family Guy, and he might have dropped a "giggity" or two. Complete with full body thrust. But, um... parenting is a learned process. Bug no longer watches the Family Guy. I'm not blaming Fox for airing the show or Seth McFarlane for creating it. WE let him watch it. WE ultimately decided he shouldn't watch it anymore. But when he is older and can understand what is going on and know what things are just for entertainment value he can watch shows like that. He watches things with us, and when he asks about things that happen we explain it in the simplest terms possible. He knows all the bad words, but he doesn't use them because he knows they are grown up words. And when he is a grown up he can use whatever words he damn-well pleases. And he doesn't know those words from any TV show he has ever watched. He learned from me us. Is some parenting group going to come to my house now and tell me I can't swear because my child will pick it up and then take it school and his classmates will learn it and then the world will explode? It's "shit". It isn't the apocalypse. Calm the fuck down.